In the restaurant business, we used to have a saying, Proper Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance. We called it "The Six P's".
I was listening to C-Span earlier in the week, and caught HHS secretary Michael Leavitt unveiling the plan to deal with an avian flu pandemic should it happen. Planning is everything, and I'm not sure why knowing of the on-going plan makes me feel a little less than confidant, but it does. Maybe the statement made by Leavitt himself admitting the limits of Federal Government:
"As powerful as the federal government is, it cannot be the cavalry that comes over the hill to every community."
Right.
So now that we all know that the Feds are leaving us to plan for our own little community pandemic, it's a good time to question municipal officials on the plans they might have for such an event. If you live in a city like New Orleans, (where police might not show up to work, or where they might just tell you to get the hell out, even if you can't walk, or don't own a car) you might want to do a little planning on your own. I had this moment of bird flu hysteria a couple of months ago after watching Fear Factor (no wait, it was CNN, same thing). I drove to the hardware store and bought a scary-looking ventilator, and told A. that it was for painting. I went out and purchased bags of rice and beans, bottled water, band-aids, and bleach. I'm not sure what the bleach will do in the event of a pandemic, but the label said, "Kills Germs On Contact". It was one of those days when I'm just too weird even for myself. I only know that I feel better having supplies in the basement.
Today, I'm not feeling weird, but wondering just which communities the Federal Cavalry will assist first. DC would be a good bet, even if the first outbreak occurs in Ohio. I'm thinking that those first million vaccines will go diectly to the White House, the Congress, and the military. The Democrats will be given a placebo except for maybe Lieberman, and the rest of the nation will have to depend on local assistance, even if living in some small township with two police officers and no hospitals.
In DC, I'm not counting on law enforcement people to be of any help, on an average day, they can't even get to the scene of a crime within 45 minutes, and upon arriving, they might just make matters worse. (in one instance, a guy who was robbed and severly beaten was harrassed by DC cops because they thought he was drunk. They waited a long time before calling an ambulance, and when they did, they told the paramedics that the guy was drunk. Once at the hospital, the guy was left on a gurney in the ER for hours until someone noticed that he was dying. He died several hours later.) In DC, it might be better if all of the cops stay home. Of course that would probaby create a lot of disorder, and folks might rob you at gunpoint for something stupid like a bottle of Nyquil. Since I am a gun-loathing liberal, I don't own a gun, and my only line of defense might be a bottle of bleach, and a scary respirator. I might be able to scare the intruder off by wearing the mask while dousing him with buckets of bleach.
Look, I'm not trying to sound like an expert, but I think you ought to consider the Six P's and work on your own little plan for survival. After all, with $400 billion and the planning of the most powerful military in the world, this Federal Government made Iraq into a mess previously unknown in US history. This Federal Government is not known for swift reponses to emergencies, just recall those folks sitting on the rooftops in New Orleans. (I hear they have solved that problem by criminalizing ignoring evacuation warnings) I'm not saying that we should be worried about this Federal Government's ability to respond to a domestic emergency, I just feel better having supplies in the basement and a gallon of bleach.
