Saturday, May 17, 2008

Polite Men of the Cloth

I remember watching Mike Huckabee during the Republican debates over the winter, and thinking that he was a really nice guy. He was speaking about immigration, and saying that we shouldn't punish the children of immigrants by denying them health care and education, since it wasn't really the children's fault that they were here illegally. He said it in such a nice and soft southern voice, and I thought, wow, here's a Republican who really is a compassionate conservative. I was thinking that here's a guy, who is a true Christian, a real man of faith, and that if he weren't a Republican, maybe I could vote for him. So I began to pay more attention to him.

And of course, the more I listened, the more I was convinced that his Christian values were not right for a nation such as ours, that his idea of changing the laws of our nation to reflect the laws of God, would not make life better for all of our citizens, namely people like me who live an alternative lifestyle. But his voice was so appealing, it was almost hypnotic, lulling me into thinking that I might be happy as a straight person, married to a guy named Bob, with hair on his chest, and an un-shaved face. And I could almost get there, but the thought of kissing a guy with razor stubble is so disgusting to me, that I'd rather not ever kiss anyone. Ever. I don't hate men physically, and I could probably live with one, if he faithfully went to get waxed at least once a week, and didn't forget to shower every day, but I'm sorry, the body hair...I just can't get past that.

And Mike Huckabee....he talks so sweet, but then he shows up at a gun rally, isn't that what all those NRA things are really? And he makes a joke about a gun being pointed at a Presidential candidate. And I'm thinking...what is a Christian doing at a gun rally, and why is he making a joke about political assassination? Some Americans remember a time when our politicians were gunned down, and we are still recovering from those violent events. You have to be wary of those sweet talking men of the cloth. Don't be fooled by a priest who takes an interest in your child, and always question the honesty of a man who preaches the words of Jesus, while at the same time speaking in favor of guns.

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